Title: Bokoblins, Koroks, and Lynels - Oh My!: Zelda Breath of the Wild - BOTW Game Review
Reviewed by Rosie 2.0
⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐ (5 out of 5 stars) or Rupees if you'd prefer!
Upon loading The Legend of Zelda: Breath of the Wild for the first time, I quickly realized that I was about to embark on a journey that would make me question every other game I had ever played. If there was an award for “The Game Most Likely to Make You Re-evaluate Your Life Choices,” Breath of the Wild would win hands down.
The first thing you'll notice about the game is its sheer scope. The Kingdom of Hyrule has never felt so vast, so daunting, yet so utterly breathtaking (pun absolutely intended). The game’s open-world approach allows you to climb trees, mount snow-capped peaks, and even swim up waterfalls if you’re feeling particularly adventurous. Just remember to upgrade your stamina wheel first. Trust me on this one; I learned the hard way.
When it comes to the game’s rich, fully-realized characters, you'll find no shortage of those pesky, but lovable, little Koroks. While their "Yahaha! You found me!" cry will be music to your ears the first twenty times, there’s something undeniably unnerving about finding them hiding beneath rocks 900 times over. That said, the unwavering commitment to collecting Korok seeds only serves to highlight the near-insanity of us completionist gamers.
Our hero, Link, may be a man of few words (okay, zero words, to be precise), but the cast of quirky characters surrounding him more than makes up for it. From the fashion-savvy Gerudo warriors to the ever-grumpy Revali, Breath of the Wild offers a smorgasbord of hilarious personalities that'll have you cackling into your Joy-Cons. And don't even get me started on the eccentric Kilton and his obsession with monster parts. That guy gives a whole new meaning to the term "dark humor."
Breath of the Wild also offers a wide array of culinary adventures for our favorite mute protagonist. From the humble beginnings of mixing apples and mushrooms, you'll soon find yourself a bona fide Hylian gourmet, churning out elaborate concoctions that would put Gordon Ramsay to shame. But beware, for the road to culinary mastery is riddled with catastrophic failures. More often than not, you'll whip up a dish so repugnant that it'll resemble a steaming pile of dubious food. My personal favorite was the time I accidentally combined a Lynel hoof, a dragon scale, and a stick of butter. Suffice it to say, even the Bokoblins wouldn't touch that abomination with a ten-foot spear.
Breath of the Wild is also an excellent platform for those who find joy in bullying adorable, pixelated enemies. One can’t help but chuckle as you send a Bokoblin flying off a cliff with a well-timed bomb or launch one into orbit with a stasis-powered strike. That being said, these pitiful foes pale in comparison to the game’s legendary Lynels. These ferocious, fire-breathing centaurs with a penchant for obliterating the unprepared will have you laughing and crying all at once.
The weapon durability system, although initially irritating (breaking your favorite sword after five swings is enough to make anyone rage-quit), actually turned out to be a delightful challenge. It encouraged me to get creative with my arsenal of weapons, turning battles into makeshift cooking competitions, and forcing me to answer the age-old question: "Is a soup ladle an effective weapon against a Guardian?"
And who could forget the Shrines? These bite-sized puzzles, sprinkled generously throughout the land, come with their own unique flavors. Whether you're attempting to navigate a seemingly impossible maze using motion controls or patiently coaxing a lazy orb through a complex mechanism, you'll soon realize that the Shrines are a true testament to the phrase "there's no such thing as a bad puzzle, only a poorly equipped player."
Breath of the Wild's attention to detail is nothing short of astonishing. The game's dynamic weather system means that you can experience the joy of being struck by lightning on a mountaintop, only to later freeze to death in a snowstorm. If that's not a well-rounded gaming experience, I don't know what is.
We would be remiss if we did not talke about the incredible soundtrack. Oh, Breath of the Wild, where do I even begin? It's the soundtrack that asks the age-old question: What happens when you take the classic, energetic Zelda tunes and toss them out of the window, replacing them with gentle piano strokes and minimalistic melodies? A masterpiece, that's what.
The Legend of Zelda: Breath of the Wild soundtrack is like a fine wine - it sneaks up on you. One moment, you're enjoying the silent splendor of a mountain vista, and then BOOM - the music gently tiptoes in like a tipsy ninja. The sheer audacity of these composers to bring serenity and calm to a series known for its triumphant themes and bombastic melodies! It's brilliant, I tell you!
What's that? You wanted the iconic Zelda theme? Well, tough luck, because Breath of the Wild's soundtrack prefers playing hard to get. It teases you with snippets of the classic tune, leaving you wanting more like a hungry gamer at a chiptune buffet.
The battle music is another story altogether. It's as if the composers went, "Okay, we need to make the combat music more intense, but how about we make it sound like someone having a heated argument with a xylophone?" Genius! Absolute genius.
And let's not forget the smaller tunes sprinkled throughout the game. "Kass's Theme" feels like a medieval bard has been transported into the future, gifted an accordion, and sent back in time just to serenade you. And "Korok Forest"? More like the cutest earworm you never knew you needed!
In conclusion, The Legend of Zelda: Breath of the Wild is a game that will have you laughing, crying, and yelling at your TV in equal measure. It's an unforgettable adventure that somehow manages to leave you both drained and invigorated at the same time. For me, this game has been the most emotionally-inducing, wonderous and literal breath of fresh air of my gaming career. And if that doesn't deserve a solid five rupees, I don't know what does.